Alright 9-5ers...my side hustle affiliate marketing business just got a lot more important!
Yesterday I was fired from my job because I asked to be spoken to in a calm and respectful manner.
For over a year I endured rages and belittling which are classic behaviors of a person with narcissistic personality disorder - a mental disorder listed in the DSM-5 (Diagnostic and Statistical Manual for Mental Disorders).
So as I pushed back, he got worse and eventually I went to stage 3 - DISCARD. Aka: Fired!
WHAT IS NARCISSISTIC PERSONALTIY DISORDER
Narcissistic personality disorder (NPD) is a cluster B personality disorder defined as comprising a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy.
SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS
In the American Psychiatric Association’s Diagnostic and Statistical Manual of Mental Disorders, Fifth Edition (DSM-5), NPD is defined as comprising a pervasive pattern of grandiosity (in fantasy or behavior), a constant need for admiration, and a lack of empathy, beginning by early adulthood and present in a variety of contexts, as indicated by the presence of at least 5 of the following 9 criteria:
A grandiose sense of self-importance
A preoccupation with fantasies of unlimited success, power, brilliance, beauty, or ideal love
A belief that he or she is special and unique and can only be understood by, or should associate with, other special or high-status people or institutions
A need for excessive admiration
A sense of entitlement
Interpersonally exploitive behavior
A lack of empathy
Envy of others or a belief that others are envious of him or her
A demonstration of arrogant and haughty behaviors or attitudes
In a proposed alternative model cited in DSM-5, NPD is characterized by moderate or greater impairment in personality functioning, manifested by characteristic difficulties in 2 or more of the following 4 areas:
In addition, NPD is characterized by the presence of both grandiosity and attention seeking.
NPD is not associated with any specific defining physical characteristics; however, physical consequences of substance abuse, with which NPD is often associated, may also be apparent on examination. Mental status examination may reveal depressed mood. Patients in the throes of narcissistic grandiosity may display signs of hypomania or mania.
FOUR PHASES OF NPD
As you can see from the image above, the 4 phases are fairly straightforward.
IDEALIZE - also called love bombing! This is when you are perfect and special and the narc puts you on a pedestal. They suck you in emotionally and you love it.
DEVALUE - also called belittle, critical, slam, smear, trivialize... They are the bully on the playground and they try their best to make you feel horrible about yourself.
DISCARD - also called throw away. This is when they are done with you because you've exposed them for who they are and they fire your butt or breakup with you.
HOOVER - also called amnesia. This is when they pretend that nothing has happened and they try to suck you back in and keep the cycle going.
HOW TO HANDLE A NARC
#1 - GO NO CONTACT AND RUN FAST! Never look back and delete that person from your life. It's also called a boundary.
#2 - DO NOT TAKE IT PERSONALLY... IT'S NOT YOU - IT'S THE DISORDER! Yes, I got fired, but there were at least three people before me that had the exact same experience. They quit first because they were lucky enough to find a new job. I wasn't that lucky so I hung on until he locked me out of everything and then said I had 'poor job performance'.
Ok enough about narcs. Let's get back to building our affiliate marketing businesses so we never have to work for someone ever again.
Grab my free ebook if you haven't already and setup your business THIS weekend!
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